Thursday, October 20, 2016

Any E-ZPass Clairvoyants Out There?

So I got the new car on Friday and went upstate for a drive of over 500 miles (or maybe it was 600) during the course of the few days from Saturday through yesterday. I was lucky enough to remember, before leaving home, that I would need my E-ZPass or at least that having it would make passing through the toll booths much swifter than paying cash. I looked for mine for hours, could not find it. I borrowed the one from my son's car.

I have a vague recollection, that on the night my prior car was totaled, back on September 3rd, just before leaving the scene of the accident with the state trooper who was nice enough to drive me to my brother-in-law's house, I remembered to grab my E-ZPass. As  I said though it is merely a vague recollection. Anyway, this weekend I got in touch with my insurance company and the other guy's insurance company and they both got in touch with the lot where the wrecked Corolla is being held and asked the staff there to look for it. I also called, only because my insurance company (as well as the other driver's insurer) asked the folks at the lot to mail it to me. I wanted to pick it up so I made arrangements since I was in that neck of the woods. That did not matter much because they said they looked for it and could not find it.

I just checked my E-ZPass account and saw that the missing tag has not been used since September 3rd, the day of the accident. What that means is that someone did not swipe it and start using it and that is good. That also means I probably grabbed it just as my little gray cells foggily remembered. It means one other thing, I need to look for it again. There are not many places I have not looked but I guess there are one or three. I will look through them first and if I do not find it then I will start all over again.

Those mischievous beings - that hide the things we look for once, look for twice, maybe even look for three times - are little rotten bastards because sure as shit they wind up putting missing items right back where you already looked for them at least a few times. Don't even try to tell me you have never searched for something repeatedly over and over again and again in the same places only to find the item that was missing in one of those places later when you really weren't looking for it any longer. Well, even if that has not happened to you, it sure has happened to me all too frequently. I swear it has to be due to gricnhes or gnomes or those little guys who climbed up out of the well in Superman And the Mole-Men (I bet my buddy Charlie K knows who I mean). 

Anyway, I have no time or patience to deal with grinches, gnomes or Mole-Men so I am seeking clairvoyants. If anyone out there can tell me specifically where is my missing E-ZPass, and tell me so before I find it on my own or report it missing to get a new one (hurry because that will likely be tomorrow or the next day) I will send you a decent thank you gift. First person to get it right and let me know in a comment to this post will be the winner. The gift will be a $10 scratch off NY State lottery ticket of my choosing and I will mail it to the person who accomplishes the mind boggling feat just mentioned (bearing in mind it must be before I either find it myself or report it lost and I will wait to do that until at least 3PM tomorrow, so you have at least until then). You must be 18 or older and the prize (a lottery ticket) must be legal for you to receive at your residence address.

By the way, when I say you must tell me specifically where is the E-ZPass tag, I do not mean that you tell me things like the following:

1. In my house.

2. In NY.

3. In my basement.

I mean you must be very specific, such as answers like:

1. It is in your range bag.

2. It is in the gun case you had the night of the accident.

3. It is in your brown jacket pocket and don't simply say in a jacket pocket, I have too many for that to be specific).

Anyway, I checked all those places twice already and it was not there but you never know with those friggin grinches on the loose.

If nobody guesses right within the limits mentioned above, or if nobody even tries, then I will buy myself the scratch off ticket.

All the best,
Glenn B



michigan doug said...

It's in the state troopers car.

Phil said...

It's either on your nightstand or mixed in with your junk mail.

Glenn B said...

Phil, I have checked the junk mail (actually my all mail) pile and it's not there. As for the night stand, my wife gave them to her brother to make room for a crib for our grandson.

Doug, if it was left in the Trooper's car we will never know. Anyway, the accident was on September 3rd and I am pretty sure he would have contacted me by now had it been there.

Jesse in DC said...

How about left at your BILs house? On in his car if he drove you home?

Jesse in DC

Glenn B said...


I already searched my brother-in-law's place a couple of times. He looked too. We could not find it. My son drove me home and I checked his car a few times, it's not there either.

Thanks for the reminder, I am going to report it lost now and order a new one.

All the best,
Glenn B