I don't know who wrote the following, oir when it was written, but I just received it in an email with no credits given. I will give credit in saying this about the for now anonymous author - he or she sure knows how to write a joke that explains just how I feel right about now:
While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."
"No problem, just let me in," says the senator.
"Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."
"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven," says the senator.
"I'm sorry, but we have our rules."
And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in evening dress. They run to greet him, shake his hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster, caviar and champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that before he realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises ...
The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.
"Now it's time to visit heaven."
So, 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.
"Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity." The senator reflects for a minute, then answers: "Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell."
So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he's in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls from above...
The devil comes over to him and puts his arm around his shoulder.
"I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?"
I CANNOT TELL YOU FOR WHOM TO VOTE, I CANNOT SUGGEST YOU VOTE FOR ONE CANDIDATE OR THE OTHER. I CAN TELL YOU THIS: I WILL VOTE FOR JOHN McCAIN AND SARAH PALIN. WHY? BECAUSE THEY HAVE CONVINCED ME THEY ARE THE ONES WHO WILL BE BEST FOR OUR GREAT NATION. YOU HAVE TO MAKE UP YOUR OWN MIND AND VOTE HOW YOUR CONSCIENCE TELLS YOU TO DO SO. HOPEFULLY YOU ARE MAKING AN INFORMED DECISION AND ARE OVERLOOKING THE HYPE AND THE ABSOLUTE TWADDLE THAT HAS BEEN RAINED DOWN UPON US FOR ALMOST 2 YEARS NOW.
SO VOTE TODAY. VOTE ON THE ISSUES, WITH KNOWLEDGE OF THEM, AND WITH A LEVEL HEAD, USING LOGIC OVER EMOTION, FOR THE CANDIDATE YOU BELIEVE TO BE THE BETTER CANDIDATE FOR THE PRESIDENCY. VOTE FOR THE CANDIDATE YOU LOGICALLY THINK WILL BE BETTER PREPARED TO STEP INTO THE ROLE OF PRESIDENT, FOR THE PERSON WHO YOU BELIEVE WILL BE BETTER ABLE TO FACE ANY CRISIS THAT MAY ARISE, FOR THE PERSON YOU BELIEVE WILL GET THE JOB DONE FOR AMERICANS AND AMERICA WHILE UPHOLDING THE CONSTITUTION OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, FOR THE PERSON WITH THE BETTER CREDENTIALS, FOR THE PERSON WHO HAS THE BETTER RECORD OF DOING GOOD FOR AMERICA, FOR THE PERSON WHO YOU THINK WILL CARE FOR THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA MORE OR BETTER THAN THE OTHER. I HAVE MADE MY DECISION, YOU NEED TO MAKE YOURS. LET'S HOPE WE, AS A NATION, CHOOSE WISELY.
Scroll down through the Red Zone to read my disclaimer, find out more about me, find contacts for government officials, get some basic information about our most cherished national documents, discover ways to help support U.S. Troops overseas, and to find links to help you learn about the Flag of the United States of America.
Use of any information or advice that I supply or to which I link is done at your own risk. Your use of my blog, in any manner, is your consent to hold me harmless and indemnify me and other sources mentioned herein, from any claim(s) against me, or those other sources, said claim(s) arising directly or indirectly from your use of this blog or any content therein or linked to it, or arising from your passing on of information from this blog to any party and their use or passing on of it ad infinitum.
ZOMBIES & ME
As for zombies - bring em on! I am ready to shoot em down or knock down depending on which type are they. The pic is of the shoot em down type but click on it to see the knock em down type.
ME BEYOND ZOMBIES
A Not So Secret Location In The Not So Free World, New York
Scroll down through The Blue Zone to find links to: Ballseye's Gun Shots, my blog rolls, firearms advocacy groups, firearms forums, online firearms and ammo dealers, firearms interest & reference sites, my other online interests, fonts of knowledge (news media and reference), and to my moth-balled rants.