Friday, December 21, 2012

End of Mayan Calenday Not The End For Me - How I Avoided Doomsday

Okay, the critters are fed and I can sit back down at the desk and start blogging again for the moment. I still have some chores to finish up, in anticipation of having about 25 folks over tomorrow for a Christmas party, but that can wait until I tell you how I cleverly broke the cipher of the end of the Mayan Calendar and figured out how to avoid doomsday. It was simple really and all the clues were there. First of all the Mayan calendar was ending today, then we had all the kooks who really believed that on this day would commence TEOTWAWKI, or the Zombie Apocalypse, or Armageddon, or the Rapture, or a collision with a huge meteorite, or the return of the dinosaurs (the carnivorous ones and they would be hungry, really hungry), or mass civil unrest, or an alien invasion (from other than Mexico) or WW III, or whatever other silly thing they could think of that would have been a real bummer for humanity. Then there were the incessant warnings from the folks at shipping companies like UPS telling us that today was the absolute last day to be able to ship in time for receipt before Christmas but only if you sent it superspeedyfastdelivery. Then there were all the folks buying up ammo, in a frenzy because of TEOTWAWKI and then after the most recent mass shooting in the face of strict gun control measures looming over us. Of course, there were the decorations everywhere, all reminding me it was the Christmas season.

It all added up and got me in gear and this year by some amazing twist of fate, I got all of my Christmas shopping done before Christmas Eve. Well, all of it for my wife's gifts and that my friends is a good thing. Had I forgotten this or that, well as you could imagine, it may have spelled out TEOTWAIKI - did you catch the change there - The End Of The World As I Know It. Thus I have avoided my own personal doomsday.

All the best,
Glenn B

Life Goes On As Usual And I Am A Bit Disappointed

There I was thinking that today would be a day full of hardship, trying times and adventure due to the Mayan Calendar coming to an end and with its end so too would TEOTWAWKI (the end of the world as we know it) be upon us. Yet, here I am at my laptop, almost bored to tears, after nothing adventurous at all happened today except maybe me going Christmas shopping and I am just typing away, now thinking that the Mayan tour guide we traveled with last December knew of what she spoke. She said the modern day Mayans believed that the end of the Mayan calendar just meant it would be time for a new calendar. Of course, the day ain't over yet and neither has the fat lady sung for today but it seems so much of another ho hum day as to bring me near to tears. What a let down.

Hark, I hear sirens in the distance - could it mean...but no, it could not be anything all that ominous as doomsday - there are not enough of them. Oh well, I suppose that I will just have more ammo than I had thought  left over after today and I can use it for the range. Maybe I will bury some too in the more likely event (more likely than doomsday anyway) that some truly ludicrous gun and ammo control measures will go into place in the not too distant future. What are you going to do with your now surplus ammo? Oh come on now, you can admit it to me that you went out and bought at least a thousand round case of your favorite caliber just in case the shit was truly going to hit the fan today! Leave a comment to let me know what you plan to do with your excess ammo; I promise, I won't laugh, I promise - really I do.

So, when is the next "End of the World" scheduled to take place? We had one today, one last year, probably at least another 3 or 4 between then and the year 2000 - not to speak of the end we purportedly faced with the coming of the new millennium. I am sure the world will end someday. It is even possible people will still be around and maybe some will wake up and even have the chance to realize, "Oh shit, this is really it" but for now I kind of don't see it in the cards. With our short time span here on the earth, my guess would be that it is more likely to end once we have all passed to the great beyond and not one soul will witness it except maybe some roaches.

Speaking of roaches, I have to go feed mine (Blaptica dubia) now; they have not gotten any new slop in the past couple of days. I need them nice and fat to feed to my Crested Geckos and Bearded Dragons and Toad so I had best finish up here.

All the best,
Glenn  B

There Are Some Real Morons With Guns...

...out there in the world, real potential Darwin Award material (and as you will see the guy in the picture has a lot of potential to win a Darwin Award). One can only hope that they smarten up. Otherwise, it just may wind up that they just wind up removing themselves from the gene pool and actually win a Darwin Award. While smartening up would be a benefit to themselves, I think that either way - getting smarter or removing themselves from gene pool - would be of benefit to mankind. Click on the below link to see what kind of person I am talking about:

http://imgur.com/p8IWx

Hat tip to Deb H for bringing this one to my attention.

All the best,
Glenn B

No Zombies Yet...

...but the day is still long. I suppose a lot could still happen over the course of the next 23 hours and fifteen minutes or so. In the meantime, while waiting for the world to end, I am going to go have a nice belt of something or other since someone finished my last HB Oktoberfest Bier and the basement mini-fridge is empty. Perhaps something with rum or vodka or a Baileys Irish Cream... Wait a minute, did I mention zombies and then rum - sounds like a winner.

All the best,
Glenn B