Saturday, April 16, 2011

An Email To My Friend Who Missed The Syracuse Gun Show

I can write one of my regular sorts of gun show reports to tell you all sorts of things about the gun show in Syracuse today but am not going to do that. Instead, I will allow you to read the light hearted email I sent to a good friend of mine who was unable to make the show today , due to family obligations, even though it was his idea to attend this show in the first place. I'll just call him Mr. K, or as I did in the email, Sahib K------- sir! we both are fans of the movie Gunga Din and always get a kick out of spoofing it (the movie, not any of the types of people portrayed in it so forego the critical comments about the style of the email). In the best spirit of the movie Gung Din, here is the email (only slightly edited) that I sent to my good friend, the one who missed the show to attend to other obligations (but his brother in law Mr. R and his friend Mr. D did attend as you shall see):

"Hello Oh Great K--------- Sahib,

Yes sir, it is I your most humble water, gun and ammo toting yet pitiful man servant who is lower than a dog - sir! I must be telling you oh great Sahib, it is you who was missing a most magnificent and wonderful event today sir. My humble son, son of a man-servant that he is, arrived at the gun show (with me) in Syracuse this morning shortly after 9 AM. We were soon admitted after waiting our turn on a line of several hundreds with more coming every moment; however sir, before entering I spied two familiar heads (or backs of them sir) a short distance ahead of my son and I on the line on which we had most dutifully been standing. Yes sir, you may have guessed it, those heads belonged to none others than Mr. Sahib R and his acquaintance Mr. Sahib D. I was so pleased to see them sir but soon returned to my young heir who was awaiting me in our place on the slowly moving line.

Soon enough though sir we were admitted in to a cavern to compete with the expanse of the greatest Dragons lair or with the enormity of Sinbad's treasure cave. And sir, oh great Sahib, speaking of treasure, the English Army would never have lost the most precious jewels of India, the Chinas, or any of the Stans had they had an arsenal such as was present therein. There were firearms and ammunition of every description. There were a few tables with swords, daggers and knives but they truly were few. Much fewer still were those tables with military surplus and only two or three had such shameful items to behold such as costume jewelry. The rest sir were dedicated to firearms, ammunition and firearms accessories. It was sir, the absolutely most impressive showing of commercially available firearms I have ever seen east of the mighty river of America - the Mighty Mississippi. (Oh sir, I spelled it right the first time, I may yet pass my citizenship test!)

Well Sahib K-----------, I went to the right upon entry and so too my son but we were soon parted amid a sea of all types of small arms weaponry and those hungering to possess them. Soon enough I again encountered Sahibs R & D but was quickly on my way to seek out my desired arms. I sought nothing less than a Remington 700 VTR in .308, a Remington Model 8 in .35 Remington and an AK-47. My son was looking at AR-15’s and shotguns and all else that might catch his eye sir. I met my son when I was in the middle of the third row of many more to come and he told me he had been around all 1,000 tables of arms dealers wares already! I was taking it slow and looking for my desired firearms sir. I also repeatedly encountered Sahibs R & D but never while in the company of my most humble son, whom I so wanted to reintroduce to them.

In passing down one row, I saw my son in another and he waived me toward him. He was deliberating on a Stag Arms AR-15 Model 1 (or was it Model 2) of one design against another. He chose the one sir, with as they say in America, all the doo-dads - such as fore end pistol grip, muzzle break, cheek piece, phony telescoping stock (looks like one but is fixed) a fore end rail for accessories, and a red dot sight already mounted. He made the purchase for $1250.00. While at said dealer’s table, I mentioned I was looking for a Rem. Model 8 upon inquiry from my son. The dealer said “Oh, sir, I have one on the other side of my display” upon which I immediately almost ran to inspect it. It was a gem among the dirt of all else around it. It was beautiful, spectacular almost without blemish on original finish but alas was not in the desired caliber of .35 Remington but was .32 Remington. I waited and searched for more with heavy heart because it was to be had at a mere pittance of a price and I desired it as my own. I later discovered that the round of the .32 Remington caliber may no longer be produced and thus I realized my passing over it may have been due to the hand of Almighty Providence as I would have rued the day I purchased it and then would have been kept from firing it by lack of ammunition.

Thus my search continued. There were many AK-47s so I had ample opportunity to return to those seen early in my search and decided to wait till I saw them all. In the last spot, the last table I would visit, there was a new Romanian WASR AK-47, in new condition as it was indeed new, as if simply awaiting me to hold it in my hands. It was priced $25 lower than any other at this or other shows I have visited at $450. I inquired, lowering the price, since I am but a humble man servant of the government, and they obliged me to buy it by lowering their price by $25. All in all, with tax sir, it was $459. Being that the least expensive other at the show was $475 plus tax and others were at $509 plus tax, for the same exact model, I am thinking I did well sir!

It is as if they were giving guns away at this show and sir, I must point out that the next time I encountered both R Sahib and D Sahib, they both had newly purchased firearms in their possession. Shortly after I again encountered my most humble and loving son of a lowly government servant that am I and he sir now had an additional firearm, a Mossberg pump action shotgun. He also had 2 bags of other goods sir all firearms related and yet wanted to purchase 2 mortar cans for a measly sum of only $20 apiece. We acquired them sir and soon thereafter made our exit hopping on the tram to the parking lot to our most humble of vehicles for our trek over the mountains homeward bound.

In all sir, between the 2 of us sir, we had been spending an amount equal to about 16,767, 889.00 Rupees or as it would be in American dollars, approximately $2,275.00. Sahib sir, I would also most definitely have purchased the Remington Model 8 had I known the caliber of it had a ready supply of ammunition. Sadly I was told not and I have since investigated several online dealers and none offer it. As I was greatly impressed by said rifle, I am greatly saddened there is no ammunition available through regular commercial outlets for it. Oh well sir, I do have my very first AK and it sir came with 2 pre-ban magazines. Oh joy of joys sir, I am so very happy as is my son sir at our great fortune to have visited this most excellent of gun shows. I am willing to bet many rupees sir, that Sahibs R & D will have more firearms purchased, than those I saw them with, by the time this show is over tomorrow - for yes sir they are remaining for day 2 of this show sir. My son and I are now at home as he must be working in his employment on the morrow.

Sir, did I mention - they were almost throwing the guns at the show attendees, the prices were more than respectable of the buyer, they were truly generous to the buyer. Beside the fabulous pricing on the wares of the many arms dealers, there were ever so many firearms of many different sorts on display. Had my son not been in a bit of a hurry to rejoin his despicable hoodlum friends (not really, most are nice) then it would have been that would have bought at least a 22 rifle as well.

It is a pity sir you were not going to the show just for today and leaving early enough to provide carriage for your most wonderful daughter. My son and I sir left by one half hour after the noontime, we were not there late at all yet had made our purchases and had achieved good karma and happiness. We arrived at our home, after a stop to eat, a stop for petrol, and a stop at Gander Mtn. in Middletown to purchase night crawlers and trout worms for my turtle, salamander and newts. The time of our arrival, at home, was at quarter to the hour of 7 in the evening. Raining as it was heavily throughout much of our return journey, we made decent to good time in our travels and all I could think, all of the way to our home, sir, was this:

Oh sir, how is it that you were so unfortunate to have missed this show?

You must never miss such a show again sir!!!

Humbly and with great sorrow at your absence in my life today,
Your lowly man-servant Gunga Glenn"

As I think you all have gathered by now, it was one heck of a great show, one that should not have been missed it at all possible. I think there is another in September and I am willing to bet that Mr. K. will be there.

Pics of our new guns to appear in future posts. By the way, these will have to qualify as our BAG (Buy A Gun Day) day purchases for this year as tax day is Monday the 18th.

All the best,
Glenn B

PS: If you have never watched Gunga Din, take the time to give it a watch. It is not a movie full of special effects, there are few if any, none comparable to those of today. Though it may seem corny by today's standards, there is something that surpasses what movies have today, and that was excellent acting on behalf of all of the main characters and even on the part of the bit characters. It is old, it is dated by it's style and political incorrectness, but it is a classic. It is one of the best adventure movies ever and it portrays things that have been lost in today's society such as camaraderie, loyalty, bravery, self sacrifice - all shown in a clean, comedic action adventure about the days of old in India under British rule. Here is a link to the trailer: